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I saw something about this new Thai soap-opera (ละคร lakawn), มาดามดัน Madame Dan, when it started in late November 2013, but only got around to tracking down a subtitled version this week. It’s suitably mad and over-the-top, launching straight into bitter rivalry right after the two and a half minutes of opening credits presaging all the wonders to come, many apparently occurring in France (?!). I decided to take some notes to help make sense of this nonsense.
Madame Dan มาดามดัน
Madame Pussy / Pushy มาดามพุชชี่
Patsy พัฒศรี
Many people in this show have multiple names and the heroine is no exception. The name used in the title, Dan, means “to push” and her other name seems to be just a Thai version of English “pushy” though it’s pronounced more like “poochy” or “poot-shee” and spelled more like “pussy”. Her real name, which of course no celebrity would use, is Patsy—a soupçon of Ab Fab in the mix?
It’s not quite clear what her profession is, but she’s some kind of media star-maker as is her rival at the beginning, Jae Miang.
Jae (Big Sister) Miang เจ๊เมี่ยง
Matchimaa มัชฌิมา
Jae Miang is the show’s bitchy queen entertainment. Always available for a cutting remark or to take offense, Jae is fiercly protective of her (she always speaks with the feminine particle ค่ะ kha) position as top-dog in the sup(ers)tar business. When Madame Poochie’s tell-all book accuses him of immorality it’s time for a dust-up in the car park followed by a day in court. Poor Madame D is ruined by the resulting payout.
Her other name, Matchimaa, means “to be moderate or in the middle”, something Jae Miang doesn’t seem to be.
Next (Nek) เน็กซ์
Bak Maa บักหมา
Pushy uses her network of talent scouts and hears of a country boy with the face of a god. This is Next (pronounced Nek) who is known to the locals in his village as Bak Maa, which means something like Master Dog. Bàk is one of those words that don’t easily translate: “a form of address applied to a man of equal status to show familiarity or contempt”. He’s called Maa because he’s a “stray dog”, i.e. an orphan taken in by his Thai parents after his French father went AWOL. He’s not that interested in becoming a star, so it takes quite a bit of work, luck and co-incidental family tensions to save Pushy’s bacon and get her a star recruit.
Other characters:
- Nuu Dawk หนูดอก / Madame Fleur มาดามเฟลอร์: Pushy’s assistant who happens to come from the same village as Next. Nuu means “mouse” but is also a childish way of saying I or me. Dawk means “flower”. She wears kooky round glasses and is therefore kooky.
- Patty แพตตี้ / แพรรตี: Next’s girlfriend, spoilt daughter of the local “business man”. She isn’t going to let go of Next in a hurry.
- Thiira: Patty’s father who is a big player in the village and often has his goons in tow. Useful for threatening Pushy when she’s judging the local beauty pagent usually won by Patty.
- Moggie หมอกี้ and Fanwanwan ฝันหวานหวาน / อุราฤดี : Airheads and Thailands most popular pretend couple. Managed by Jae Miang. Fanwanwan means something like “sweet illusion” < fanwan “vainly hope, cherish an illusion” (fan ฝัน “to dream, imagine”) and wan หวาน “sweet”. Moggie I’m not sure about but maw หมอ can mean “doctor, fellow, guy” so maybe he’s Dr. Gee?
- plus several others we haven’t met yet.
More info: Broadcast Thai (in Thai)
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In the past week a stupid controversy has been whipped up by the leader (if they really have one) of the conservative UMP, Jean-François Copé. He’s objecting to a children’s book being ‘promoted’ in primary schools. In fact, this book is one of 500 texts suggested by the ABCD of Equality website to the 10 schools trialling a program to combat sex stereotypes.
So what’s he so het up about? Nudity! Nudity destroying children’s respect for authority. This cheeky and charming little book, Tous à poil ! (Everyone naked!), shows a variety of people stripping off and in the end having a swim. In standard children’s book style, it repeats the same formula on each page: Á poil le bébé ! The baby naked! Á poil la boulangère ! The (lady) baker naked! À poil le policier ! The policeman naked! À poil la mamie ! Granny naked! À poil le chien ! The dog naked! Á poil la maîtresse ! The teacher naked! À poil les dames de la cantine ! The canteen ladies naked! etc. The purpose of all this is pretty clear to anyone with a brain—to defuse body anxiety by showing a variety of body types, satisfy that childish curiosity and to show that people are, at some level, all the same.
It was interesting to see some of the other books, either recommended or related.
Zizi, Zézette : mode d’emploi (Willy, Fanny*: instruction manual)
Caractéristiques techniques : les zizis et les zézettes sont produits de façon artisanale. Cela explique pourquoi ils sont tous différents. Forme, taille, couleur sont autant d’éléments de personnalisation qui font de son zizi ou de la zézette un modèle unique et exclusif.
Specifications: willies and fannies are bespoke products. This explains why they are all different. Shape, size, colour are all customised features that make each willy or fanny a unique and exclusive model.
à quoi tu joues ? (what are you playing at?) contrasts common stereotypes (e.g. boys never cry) with a fold-out picture showing the opposite (e.g. Yannick Noah crying after winning a tennis match). Although all the examples I’ve seen seem to be stereotypes about boys there are also apparently girls piloting rockets and so on.
Mademoiselle Zazie a-t-elle un zizi ? (Does Miss Poppy have a peepee?)
Pour Max, les choses sont claires et le monde est divisé en deux : les "avec zizi", qui sont les plus forts, et les "sans zizi", les filles, quoi ! Les pauvres... Jusqu'au jour où arrive Zazie, une fille qui joue au foot, dessine des mammouths, grimpe aux arbres... C'est sûr, il s'agit d'une imposture. Max décide de prouver à tout le monde que Zazie est une tricheuse qui a un zizi. Une surprise l'attend.
For Max, things are simple and the world is divided in two: the “with peepee”, who are strong, and the “without peepee”, girls, poor things! Until the day that Poppy arrives, a girl who plays football, draws mammoths, climbs trees. It must be some kind of trick. Max decides to prove to the world that Poppy is a cheater who has a peepee. A surprise awaits him.
I’m guessing we don’t have this kind of thing in schools in Australia, but does anyone know? I think it’s a good idea to challenge sexism as early as possible. What do you think?
* The best translation I could come up with for zézette. English seems to have no problem with cute names for penises, but can be a bit evasive about lady-bits. Discuss.
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Here are the three contenders for France’s 2014 Eurovision entry chosen by the jury. Quirky, moustache-positive pop vs. freedom ballad vs. boy band. Sadly I think they’ll go for the boy band.
Twin Twin - Moustache
“Video” with English translation
Quelque chose me manques, mais quoi?
Je veux-ci je veux ça!
Quand j'dors, j'fait des rêves en dollars
Tout les jours, j'ai un nouveau costard
Chez moi tout est neuf, tout est beau
Le monde pleure derrière mes rideaux
J'men fous j'habite au dernier étage
J'connais même pas ma femme de ménage
Y'a du cuir, dans ma voiture
L'odeur de mon parfum me rassure
Je n'aime pas montrer mes émotions
à la salle de musculation
Je soulève quelques poids et altères
Mon corps est une machine de guerre
J'ai tout ce qu'on rêverait d'avoir
J'ai peut-être tout c'est vrai mais
Moi j'voulais une moustache
Moustache x6
Refrain:
Je veux ci je veux ça
Y'en a jamais assez pour moi
C'est comme-ci c'est comme ça
Y'a toujours un truc que j'ai pas
[x2]
Je veux ci je veux ça
C'est comme-ci c'est comme ça
Je veux ci je veux ça
C'est comme-ci c'est comme ça
Y'a toujours un truc que j'ai pas
Alors j'en rajoute encore
Des tonnes de choses derrières mes placards
J'ai des amis quand mêmes
Et même j'ai des amis qui m'aime
J'me dit j'ai tout pour plaire
J'ai tout pour, j'ai
Le monde à mes pieds (C'est fou)
J'ai tout ce qu'on rêverait d'avoir
J'ai peut-être tout c'est vrai mais
Moi j'voulais une moustache
Moustache x6
Refrain:
Je veux ci je veux ça
Y'en a jamais assez pour moi
C'est comme-ci c'est comme ça
Y'a toujours un truc que j'ai pas
[x2]
J'donnerais tout ce que j'ai
Contre une moustache
Maintenant je sais
Ce que je veux c'est
Une moustache
J'pourrais tout laisser
Tout donner
Pour une moustache
J'ai peut-être tout c'est vrai
Mais pas ce que je voulais
Refrain:
Je veux ci je veux ça
Y'en a jamais assez pour moi
C'est comme-ci c'est comme ça
Y'a toujours un truc que j'ai pas
[x2]
Moustache
Joanna - Ma liberté
“Video” with English translation
Si jamais je te vois,
Surtout ne te retourne pas,
Et si jamais je te parle,
Fait comme si tu n'écoutais pas
Et si jamais je t'enlace,
Dis moi que tes deux bras n'ont plus de place,
Quelque soit le temps, quelque soit l'effort,
Je veux simplement..
Refrain:
Ma liberté,
La seule chose que je demande, c'est ma liberté,
J'ai besoin que tu me rende, ma liberté
Je te laisse mon amour fou, pour effacer
Celle que j'étais à genoux, ma liberté
Si jamais je souris,
Ne regarde pas vers moi, (Oh Oh)
Et si jamais je te pleure,
Dit moi que ça te laisse froid
Pour que j'aime autant,
Pour que j'aime encore,
Fait moi revenir
Refrain:
A ma liberté
La seule chose que je demande, c'est ma liberté,
J'ai besoin que tu me rende, ma liberté
Je te laisse mon amour fou, pour effacer
Celle que j'étais à genoux, ma liberté (Non Woh oh oh)
Ma liberté
Destan - Sans toi
Dean:
Si j'ai fait des erreurs
Je m'en veux autant te dire
Tu me sais par coeur
Et m'aide a réussir
Quentin:
J'ai sur le palais
Un gout un peu amer
Kilian:
I've realized the love we had then
You vanished un the aiiiiiiiiiiir
Refrain 1(×2):
I know you wanna leave me tonight
I know you wanna fell alright
I know you wanna say goodbye
But i want you to stay not to fly Away
Kilian:
J'imagine mon avenir
Tu vois au fil des jours
J'imagine mon avenir
Avec toi sans détour
Tu reviens dans ma viiie
Quentin:
Je me fait tant violence
Oui en refusant de croire
That our story is over
Cause i love the way we are
Refrain 1(×2)
Refrain 2:
Sans toi la vie quitterait mes bras
Sans toi ma terre ne tourne pas
Sans toi j'ai comme un mal de vivre
Mais au font toi tu sait que je t'attendrai
Dean:
Si tu veux t'en aller
Je ne peux te forcer
A rester a mes côtés mais j'attendrais
Quentin:
Everyday
I will wait and part
Doesn't matter what they say
Refrain 2
Refrain 1
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Spaced Out posing for pics in their cossies after Pride March 2014
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Since all my Firefox extensions just got trashed by some evil adware (timed to activate on the 1st?), it might be time to make a list of useful extensions.
Essential
- Adblock Plus
- Flashblock
- Greasemonkey
- Session Manager
- DNubs (Download Statusbar)
- Tab Mix Plus
Very useful
Good to have on hand
Bloatage that I like anyway
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The Landfillharmonic Orchestra (movie trailer)
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“Clothing made from rushes for duck hunting”
from the book Manufrance: Un siècle de vente par correspondance by Jean-Pierre Pernaut
Image source: France 2
Manufrance is a French mail-order company (now a web store) founded in 1888, originally specialising in rifles and bicycles, but also selling a wide range of stuff.
Strangely enough they also sell this book.
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Forensic scientist, Philippe Charlier, of the University of Versailles, and Philippe Froesch, of the Parc Audiovisual de Catalunya in Barcelona, have published their reconstruction of the face of Maximilien de Robespierre based on his death mask, contemporary portraits and the accounts of witnesses.
They have also diagnosed him as a sufferer of Sarcoidosis, which, although it sounds like an overdose of Nicolas Sarkozy, is in fact an auto-immune disease.
See also:
Guardian - Robespierre was 'riddled with maladies' at time of his execution
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AM - 18/12/2013: Uranium clean-up strategies challenged by new study abc.net.au/am
WMA audio and transcript at the link above. |
I haven’t been able to find out much more about this research by Professor Rizlan Bernier-Latmani, but it doesn’t sound great for the Northern Territory.
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Apple’s Merry Xmas Manipulation
with music by Cat Power (Chan Mitchell)
Without Apple you are nothing. Barely human in fact. If you want your real, essential, wholemeal, wholesome humanity proven and recorded forever you’d better buy an iPhone pretty damn quick!
At least, that’s the message I take away from this.
Alternatively, it’s saying “Kids get out there and make some lame Xmas video with your phone so that the olds will buy you a new one, thinking this is what you use it for rather than sending female classmates dick pics.”
Though, to tell the truth, I didn’t pick up on the narrative the first time through, so maybe their scripting and/or editing could do with some work. Just because the subject’s a teenager’s video doesn’t mean the whole thing needs to look like a teenager’s video.
- If only we all had this kind of perseverance
- Strange Fruit
- Is the Tea Party a secret comedy troupe?
- A sad discovery
- Traditional Inhuman Rights from the IPA
- Advice from Tim Minchin
- Inspiration for the fake signer?
- No Facebook, bad network!
- An Madra Dubh • The Black Dog
- I am Divine
- Things are gettin’ Steamy in the loungeroom
- Welcome to the POSSE
- Goulburn River High Country Rail Trail, November 2013
- What the USA needs...
- Not so ’orrible